I have been thinking a great deal about what it means to be an empath and intuitive lately. I love to feel what others are feeling. At times it is very difficult. However, I do care about each and every individual I connect to.
As an empath we physically register what others are going through. We feel feelings, ailments, and if truly adept, an empath can even psychically read through the energy they are "networking with". Some of us can even feel what spirits feel when we come into contact with them too.
That doesn't mean we fully understand their situation. Nor should we. Some situations are private, or ones we would never want to be fully immersed in.
I have worked with families of those who have committed suicide, parents whose children have died, terminally ill patients. I have not taken their journey. I have only a small glimpse of what they have gone through. I can be there for them.....I do have to have a sense of detachment.
THIS is ultra important. it doesn't mean we don't care. it means we become the anchor and calm in the storm.
If a teenager is getting out of hand and they bring down the wrath of a parent, most times I can feel their anxiety, I can feel their frustration and yes I do want to help, but I must always remember I can only get involved to a small degree.
Most people with a heightened or acute empathic ability will plunge in and try to fix things immediately or play psychiatrist or try to make everything better.
We do this because we are healers. We heal. It is not only in our nature, but along with empathic awareness comes insight and inner sight. The ability to know the outcome of situations before they happen or the different paths that will lead to the best outcome.
We have a bad habit of trying to mitigate what we think could be damage before it is done. it is frustrating when the participants in the situation won't listen to what we feel is the voice of reason.
Here's the thing though. Sometimes people have to go through their stuff in order to grow. it may not be pleasant, but birth and rebirth rarely is (ask any woman who has had a child:)) The end result though is wonderful.
Okay, so does that mean we should stay out of situations? No, we can feel out the situation, add our perspective without trying to make it better, or sometimes stay out all together (which is in of itself healing at times) . We make amazing listeners, mediators and friends and loved ones if we put aside the need to put a band aid on the boo. Pretty hard for most people, extra hard for true empaths. In most cases we will find there is actually very little to fix.
Many empaths find it hard to navigate life easily. We take on so much, not realizing that we don't have to invest so much of ourselves into what we are feeling from others. It truly is an emotional and physiological thing that is happening.....but its not ours. It belongs to someone else and we need to remember that. Some distance may be required for the health of all involved.
How do I not take it on? is something I hear quite often. Its not about taking on other peoples stuff. Its about letting it go once we've experienced it, and have done our part to help the situation in whatever capacity we are meant to. Knowing others emotions, ailments, experiences....yes even memories are not yours, allows us to give ourselves permission to let go (a surgeon never leaves the room with his/her scalpel. They leave it in the operating room). It is the sign of not only a mature energy worker, but a mature person.
Having a life that you love to live will create an emotional strength in you that will help you discern what is yours and what is not and know how to remove yourself from the situation. Detachment is mandatory in some cases.
Discerning our emotions and thoughts from others can be difficult at times. A deep understanding of ourselves and of who we are, and what our abilities are meant for gives us the calm and grounding on this path. It aids us in finding our calling, and also keeps us sane. So many sensitives shut down and cannot partake in everyday things successfully like go shopping, or to a movie because of the excess energy from others they take on.
When we begin to know ourselves we then begin to discern and know what is ours and what is not and be able to say "hang on a second, that's not like me to respond that way, " or "that's not mine, Im in a good space in my life".
Once we recognize this difference then we can ask that it be taken from us and sent back to where it came from. Sometimes I cant' quite tell and I will say those exact words. "if what i am feeling is not mine, please take it back to where it came from."
the contradictory feelings will normally subside within minutes. If they don't I know It's my own stuff and its time to sit down and face the music.
There are those who don't want to let go. I know some true empaths who don't want to let go of others pain and suffering. It becomes their mission to hold some of others stuff so they don't have to suffer alone or in silence. However, that's like two people hanging on to the same piece of burning wood, one BY CHOICE. It limits the help that can be given and now there are two people suffering. It will in the long term affect health if the experience is not released. it can lead to physical issues (taking on of someone elses disease or ailment), emotional instability, or spiritual disconnection. Staying healthy is a must. The more heightened you are the more you must know yourself well.
There are protections you can put around yourself too. Envisioning something around you and letting all you need in and keeping all you don't need out is one way. click here for the full protection. Some may do this others may have their own ways. Whatever works is what is correct. How you will know its working is that you feel good, strong and participate fully in life.
It is a gift to have heightened awareness. It is unfortunate that we have lived in a society that has not been able to, and reluctant to give guidance at an early age. It is the blessing of our time however, that we are more aware and willing to learn and grow. Our children and future generations will have the path paved for them to be the compassionate, fully loving human beings they are meant to be in a healthy and vibrant way!